"They that love beyond the world cannot be separated from it.
Death cannot kill what never dies.
Nor can spirits ever be divided, that love and live in the same divine principle,
the root and record of their friendship. If absence be not death, neither is theirs.
Death is but crossing the world, as friends do the seas;
They live in one another still."
I have been watching my little boy Cinnamon and my little girl Toonces for a few weeks now, noticing changes in their eyes, and their weight. Cinnamon's eyes are becoming more sunken, and her gait is very unsteady. Toonces is losing weight and is becoming more 'tolerant' of me - she used to hate me holding her. She now cuddles into me, and sleeps at my head every night. They are both what you would consider 'geriatric.' Toonces is 16, Cinnamon is 14. I know it could be a number of things and that given time, and money, could be treatable. I also look at it a different way though - making them go through treatments at the vet, where they are stressed enough, would ultimately be for my sake, not for theirs. How much more could I ask of them? You cannot avoid death; but often it is possible to avoid suffering. I look at it from the perspective of what is right for them and what would spare them pain. When the time comes, it will not be an easy decision still, but I cannot stand by and watch them suffer when it was within my power to prevent that. By not acting, I would not be prolonging their lives, I would be prolonging their deaths. So I will be keeping my eye on my oldest babies and make the decisions when the time seems right. They are, after all, my own children.
A friend sent me a quotation shortly after my last round of kitties died this past summer. It said that a good death was not about when or how; it was about knowing love. This comforted me greatly, because, for all my mistakes, my cats did know love.
An update on Vanessa - her new name is Heidi. Her new 'mom' said she has the colors of a hyena (to which I gasped in horror when she said this), but then I thought hyena's are God's creatures too! And new 'mom' said that Vanessa seemed to like her new name, and that it was prettier too! So be it, her sister Izzy Bella is getting a little better with Heidi, so its hopefully going to be a match made in heaven. Will keep you posted this weekend! I miss her terribly though.
At my Webster spot, the nearly all white kitty came up to me this morning, and I could swear she is pregnant. I felt her belly, and it is very full, but I could not feel any nipples. I am wondering if those have to be present in order to be pregant. If any of my cat knowledgeable friends can let me know, I would sure appreciate it!
Tomorrow is supposed to be TNR day. As much as I dread it, I am prepared. I didn't put down as much food at some of my spots this morning, and none at one, so that they are very hungry tomorrow. Wish me luck!
I am thankful for your thoughts about the ending of a beloved pets life Janine. I have spent outrageous amounts on pets with cancer and other very difficult and intrusive to treat illness of all my pets. I look at it differently now, feeling guilty about not doing enough thru a pets illness, is not the same as being guilty of it. It goes without saying the cost of it is secondary, the fact is, the quality of life was not worth the stress of the treatment, to my dear kittys. This realisation and point of view, only comes after many sad losses. God bless you and your beautiful fur babies.
ReplyDeleteThats funny about Heidi/Vanessa. I have one exactly the same colour and although I had to rescue her, and she is very sweet, at first I thought the same thing, what an awful coat colour, like a Hyena ! but.... since bringing her into my home, her coat is very beautiful. It is shiny and soft and shows many different deep orange shades, and blonde colours, as well as a rich black. Heidi/ Vanessa's new home sounds lovely, what a kind person her new mom must be. You do a great job in selecting parents for these very needy cats Janine.
ReplyDeleteI think that being able to feel nipples just means that they have nursed a litter before. that this may very well be a very pregnant cat but that it is her first litter. I don't think their mammary glands fill up with milk till maybe right before, or even right after, they actually give birth.
ReplyDeletesince no one else offered any advice on this question, i thought that i should, since it sounds like this cat IS pregnant.
C
prego kitties don't have nipples unless they've nursed kittens in the past. It's the nursing that elongates the nipple from a little nubbin (like a male would have) to something more like a grain of rice. They don't have milk either until they've given birth, so they don't have swollen mammary glands.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry that Toonces and Cinnamon are not doing well. I dread when that time comes at my house and hope I'll be as brave as you are.
ReplyDeleteVanessa sounds like she has a wonderful new home! I'm so happy for her and pray that she and her new sister work it out. :)