Tough Morning

“when you’re sitting on a plane 40, 000 feet up in the air, looking out the window, dreaming of your future and how bright it appears to be, or maybe just watching the drops of rain being pushed into different designs from the force of air at 400 mph, well, life feels good. it feels safe, your seat belt is on and your feet are up. then the oxygen masks fall, the plane jumps, snaps and jolts. people start to scream, babies burst out crying, people start praying all in time to the overhead announcement that we’re gonna crash. right then, as your life flashes before your eyes, you hear yourself say, “god, if you get me outta this one, i’ll stop using forever.” right then the nose of the plane pulls up and the captain says, “wow, that was a close one, folks. we’re ok, we’ll be landing in thirty minutes and we’re all safe and sound, sorry for the scare…” that’s how getting hooked on junk is, and when the kick is over you can’t believe you ever got on that plane in the first place. the question is, will you ever fly again?” 
― Nikki Sixx, The Heroin Diaries:

If you read yesterday's post, here is an update.  Life support was removed yesterday just before 6:12 p.m., the time that Chris was pronounced dead.  He leaves behind his mom, his daughter, 18, from a previous marriage, and these three little girls - and of course their mom, my niece, Amy.  Its a terrible heartbreaking tragedy all the way around.  My heart just breaks for the survivors here - the girls will be told today when they get out of school that their daddy is gone.   Coincidently, my father died on the same day many years ago - April 11th.  I was just 9.  He was just 39.  My sister and I were told the next day also.  He died of Hodgkins lymphoma, not heroin.  Nevertheless, he has been missed by me every single day of my life since.

Ava, Ella, Hannah

To make matters worse, as I was feeding the cats on Niagara, the ones that cannot climb the fence to eat, and are not smart enough to cross the street where I have a shelter set up, the big fat POS man who obviously has no life, came walking toward me.  He came silently out of the gate, and got his little pad of paper out, and started to write the license plate number down.  Then - whether he really did or not - called the police.  On top of this, I had two traps set, as today is TNR day.  I yelled out to him - and he ignored me as he was 'talking' - that I would be back, that I had to check on my traps.  Who had time for this bull____.  I went back to the first set trap on Pennsylvania and Second, where I've been feeding a sweet, but scared beautiful red tabby, young.  Nothing.  At this point, I just couldn't continue. I had already set my trap up on Baldwin earlier in hopes of getting a cat that comes around, a black cat, who needs to be neutered, but is a biter.  Kind of like Blackie was years ago, on Stout Street.  There was another nice gray tiger in the trap that had already been neutered, so I opened the door for him as he casually strolled out.  The black kitty, I grabbed by the scruff as I had the carrier door standing open, and placed him in the wrong way.   They get their paws on the sides of the carrier and hold on for dear life.  He got away.

Rocky from Central - trapped this morning

I went to the second set trap on Central and Fifth, where there is a family I am feeding now, all feral, pretty much, and there in the trap was a young tabby, under a year, sweet looking, but I am sure feral.  So I  have one for today that will go to the clinic, for $50, and be spayed or neutered.  I guess its better than none.  This little one is little.  Definitely less than a year.  Just a little tyke.  Its HORRIBLE to have to return to the street tomorrow morning.  Horrible.  By the way, I never did go back to Niagara to confront the situation, but I did go back and place another dish of food.  It was gone again when I left for work, and I poured more down on the sidewalk.  Ha. Take that you fat JERK.  Again, this is animal neglect/cruelty at its legal finest.

With all the stress this day has brought so far, its best I guess.  There will be more to come.  At work and with the family situation.  Sometimes, you wonder how much you can handle.  Sometimes, I just want to go back to bed and never get up again.  Too much sadness and worry about everything.  Job, bills, the future, death.  Its just too much sometimes.

Have a nice day.

"Death must be so beautiful.  To lie in the soft earth, with the generous grasses waving above one's head, and listen to the silence.  To have no yesterday, and no tomorrow.  To forget time, to forgive life, to be at peace."

Life

There has been a tragedy in my family this weekend, so we are all trying to keep it together, keep plugging along at this thing called life - because this is, after all, the land of the living - we must move on, if not for our own sake, then for the sake of the others.  There are cats to be fed, a house to keep up, children to be raised, hopefully a job each day to go to so that the bills can be paid, people who still need people.  For those of you that harbor resentment, anger, frustration, none of that matters in the big scheme of things.  People are dying or near death every day.  You won't appreciate that until you are experiencing it first hand.  But remember, its just around the corner for each of us.  Hopefully for each of us, it won't happen until its supposed to.

I know most of you are wondering what happened.  The father of my niece's (yes, the one who's cat had all those dead baby kittens - and I have the surviving one - Peppercorn) children took an overdose of heroin when he was babysitting the three children Saturday night.  He is now on life support.  We had no clue he even used.  Such a nice guy, really.  And boy did he love those children. Obviously, heroin is an epidemic, and completely controls you once addicted.  We are praying for a positive outcome, but its highly doubtful, and will be a very sad tragedy for these three little girls. And of course, you can imagine what his mom is going through right now.  Thank you for keeping this family in your prayers.

Peppercorn

The rest of the weekend was not much out of the ordinary, except Hermie went to his new home, to join his dad Eddie, and his brother Parsley, who really needed a companion because his dad works a lot.  It was a smooth transition from the carrier he was brought over in, into the little playpen like structure I set up in Eddie's bedroom.  Eddie's place is the perfect environment.  Its quiet, and super clean.  No clutter.  I love it.  I couldn't be happier with this set up!

Hermie

Esmeralda has been named Coco Bean - a perfect name for her.  (and it even has my name - bean - in it!)  I was sent a pic of Cammy, and a little update by his new Mom.

Cammy

Cammy (yup, still Cammy tho his nicknames are meatball, big guy, and cam man) is doing great!

He's taken over my husband's side of the bed (see pic) and officially believes he owns this place! He has really warmed up to all of us- great with my kids too.

His cough is all gone- turns out he has asthma but is controlled with a shot every 6 months or as needed. He has been completely fine since his first dose so it seems to be working well.

He is running around like crazy playing with Blue and all of my daughter's hair bows (much better then cat toys in his opinion). He is becoming quite the active guy!

So, all is well!

My heart swelled at the photo, I am just so thrilled at these successful placements.  Now we need to get Marbles, and so many others!  Marbles still continues to run to my truck each morning in the dark, knowing the sound of it, and doing a pirouette until I pick her up.  She is a true sweetie.  We must get her at least fostered.  Anyone?

Thanks for reading, and have a SAFE day all.

"No matter how you feel, get up, dress up, show up, and never give up."

Thank God.

Just a quick one today.

Finally, there was Mr. Whiskers #2.  I have not seen him for two days now since I released him back to Short Street after he had his abscess treated on Tuesday.  I could see his paw looked red and raw, but hopefully its good.  I did not see him limp, so maybe it really is on the mend.  He was steering clear of me, that is for sure. He, along with Baby Buttons, the fluffy red, Molly-the black and white kitty, the muted calico, and the friendlier one who is unneutered that has been hanging around were there, as they all usually are each morning waiting for food.  The bowls are totally empty there when I arrive each day.  I think there are so many rats there that they eat up all the food.

Marbles was there to greet me this morning.  There are so many cats waiting for homes.  Right now, Marbles is my next target.  But there is also a very fluffy red beautiful baby on Melville that has been coming up to me more and more.

MARBLES

Esmeralda, the kitty I rescued back in March from Parsells, went to her new home yesterday.  They will rename her, but here she is with her new pop.  I couldn't be any happier.

ESMERALDA

Tomorrow, we bring Hermie, the kitty I rescued from Webster Avenue last year, who had been fostered by Melissa for several months now, to his new home to join Parsley.  This will be a tough transition, because Hermie was afraid to the extreme, he had some tough times trying to survive on the streets, carried a baseball sized hernia for a long time that was zapping his strength, and has come to trust Melissa and his feline sibs, and the only place he has ever felt secure in.  We are hoping that in time, he will learn to trust his new human Eddie, and love his new brother Parsley.  Please keep him in your thoughts.  :)

Hermie on the right

PARSLEY

Its snowing out today.  Really.  C'mon.  Its April 8th.  Can we get a break here.

"One small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day."

TGIT!

To update from Tuesday.  

Esmeralda will go to her new home today!  I am so excited!  I hope she lives a good long life with her new family.  Thanks Costellos for a successful third fostering!  

Marbles was waiting for me this morning, and yesterday morning. He sure needs a warm home right now.  

Marbles

Mr. Whiskers #2 was let back to his spot on Short Street after I got home from work.  He was treated for an abscess on his paw, given antibiotic, and was good to go, according to vets.  He was in a cramped carrier, and I just couldn't see him in there overnight.  He was miserable.  Both cats trapped yesterday were males, both pretty - I'd say between feral and semi.   Today is day two that he wasn't there.  I am so worried now.

I had a few individuals inquire about the beautiful Himalayan/ragdoll/whatever – the pretty kitty – about if a rescue could take in the cat.  Keep in mind, I don’t’ have a lot of time to research/investigate/make calls/write notes etc., even if I did know specifically who I was writing to – it’s a matter of 24 hours on Tuesdays when I TNR (trap, neuter, return).  In those 24 hours, I have a nine hour day at work, hopefully seven hours in bed, an hour and a half feeding homeless cats in the hood, and hour (if I get up on time at 2:45 am.) to dress and groom, have coffee, wake up before heading out the door at 4.  I won’t bore you with the other two hours I have before I have to go to bed in order to get up at 2:45, but you catch my drift.  My life is pretty boring.  Thanks God for wine.  

In an ideal world, all rescues, and people interested in keeping a cat that will be returned to the street the next morning, would read my blog, and offer to take them, within the short window I have them, but it doesn’t happen.  God bless you to those that hope and pray they don’t go back to the streets!  Both kitties trapped on Tuesday were pretty feral.  Neither would ever let me see them.  Well, Little Red would peek around a corner but if I shined my light on him, he would hide.  His brother and sister, all whom were born last spring, allow me to pet them.  But not Lil Red.  And the other pretty one, he runs far until I am gone.  I could have sworn he was a she, and pregnant.  But no, it was a he.  BTW, he was not around this morning either.

Sometimes, these TNR’s will come around and slowly trust me, and many have.  Many many TNR’s have been adopted.  Ask most of the adopters, the ones that have their ear clipped. They were TNRs, and now they are loving companions.

Unfortunately its usually the pretty kitties that people inquire about.  What about the other not so pretty kitties?  They are all beautiful in my eyes.  And I’ve seen some really ugly cats.  I’ve even got one (sorry Brady) that no one wanted to adopt.  So I had to keep him.  All are worthy, all are beautiful in my eyes.  But of course, there are those that I have rescued that were absolutely gorgeous, who am I kidding.  Especially the really fluffy ones.    Here are a few stunners I’ve rescued: 

OOPS!  How did my luscious lemon cake get in there?

Hey!!  How did this get in there?

I could post pics all day of beautiful kitties I've rescued, and believe me, they were hard to give away.  Maybe tomorrow, some pics of not so pretty kitties!  :)

Have a nice day!

"There is a kind of beauty in imperfection."

What a Day!

Dear Mr. Whiskers #2.  You will never know how lucky you are to have me.  I know you are mad and upset and angry now, but if you only knew the trouble I went through for you today!

I know you came up to me willingly this morning because after all these years, you finally trusted me enough to run to me daily when you heard me pull up to your ‘home’ on Short Street, and allow me to pet you, if only briefly each time.  You didn’t trust me so much when I had you neutered, along with the rest of the gang you hang with there.  But finally there came a breakthrough.

You got your name Mr. Whiskers the Second because you looked identical to Mr. Whiskers the First, whom my friend Nancy adopted sight unseen, because he was so cute. 

This morning you gave a lot of people a lot of grief.  When that nice lady came over in the dark after we finally finished feeding all those other kitties, and trapping the other two for spaying, she just wanted to check your paw.  But unfortunately, you were very strong and pushed your way past her when she opened up the carrier door.  You went crazy trying to get out of the box you were in (jeep) and didn’t know where you were.  She tried to grab you but you bit her!  Not just once, but couple of times too!  Finally, after she got up the courage, she tried to get you back into the carrier again, and she did.  We know that hurt your paw even more by all this, but what were we to do???

After I, your food and shelter source, was so upset about all that had happened, and about you!, I reached out to some nice folks on Facebook (I know, you don’t know what that is…) and asked for advice.  A few people pointed out that I should take you to those nice doctors near the lake, and I called and got you an appointment.  Then a nice lady offered to come pick you up, and take you to the appointment!  So Val came and took you, the nice doctors opened up the carrier door, and you went crazy again!  Not only did the abscess on your paw burst all over the place, but you bit someone in the room too!  I know its because you were in so much pain and you just didn’t understand all these people were just trying to help you out.  Then the nice doctor finally got a shot of anesthesia into you and off you went to sleep, while they cleaned out your wound and gave you your shot of convenia that is good to go for two weeks. 

Then some nice person, and we don’t know who it is, called to donate money toward your $107 bill!  Then that nice lady Val came back to get you and put you on my porch for the night.  We fed you and kept you covered and warm. 

So let me tell you little fella, as much as it pained me to put you back to that hellhole of a home I tried to make for you and your friends the best I can, where most recently little Buttons was rescued, and at least 15 others before her over the past few years… must do it.  I also think, for the time being, you will be happy to go back there to Baby Buttons, and Little Red, and Molly.

The weather will soon be better than the six inches of snow we’ve had the past two days, in which you had to limp your way around on three legs, but you will be feeling better in no time, and I can’t wait to see you hippity hop up to me when I come to feed you again.

You are much loved Whiskers #2, and someday soon, you will have all the love, comfort, safety and peace that you, and all the others out there, deserve. 

But no more biting! 

With Love, your ‘mama’  xoxooxoxox

Over My Head

Marbles was there in the cold snow.

I trapped a beautiful blue-eyed Siamese - no, not Siamese - same coloring, but not Siamese, very furry, or pregnant, on Parsells, near Crazy Lisa's house, and at the next two stops, behind a house, I got another very fluffy red kitten - just a year old.  Both flipped out, but calm now in the truck. 

Born last spring

I also grabbed Mr. Whiskers #2 who cannot walk due to a very swollen paw, and he will be going into the emergency clinic today.  I am way over my head with this one.  I have no idea what they will charge.  I have nothing.  I need help.  I am beyond too proud to ask for it.

Mr. Whiskers #2

If anyone can contribute, please go to the donate button on this page to your right, and click on it.  It doesn't matter what amount.  If everyone did just something, you will have done your part to help an injured animal today, an animal that is not mine, but ours.

UPDATE:  Whiskers is being whisked off to Caring for Cats right now for 9:15 appt.  If anyone wants to call vet directly, its 585-865-5220.  Thanking you in advance.

Have a nice day.

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

So this may be the creep(s) that have been taking my shelters off the porch of this house here on Parsells.

Does anyone know of them???

http://www.ripoffreport.com/r/Douglas-Shanley-Jr/Springwater-New-York-14560/Douglas-Shanley-Jr-Douglas-Stanley-Jesse-James-Construction-Five-Brothers-Construction-1041691

Lots of stuff this weekend.  It was a tough weekend for me emotionally.  First, my company left.  She was wonderful company, and I will miss her.

Saturday morning, I noticed Mr. Whiskers #2 on Short Street limping, but ran into the shelter upon seeing me pull up with his breakfast.  Yesterday morning, after peeking inside where I place the food, where the shelter are grouped and covered with tarp, I saw Mr. W inside a shelter peeking out, not moving, but staying still while I placed the food down, and thought - maybe tomorrow morning he will come to me and I can grab him.  This morning, same thing, but he came out.  You can tell something is wrong with his front paw.  It looks swollen, and is certainly painful.  He came out, I pushed the dish toward him for his convenience so he didn't have to move too far, and he dashed out of the shelter.  Of course, there was four fresh inches of snow on the ground since Saturday morning.

Between him and the Niagara Street cats situation, I can't sleep. I awoke last night (Sunday early morning) and just couldn't get either off my mind.  I have such ill will toward the man who is throwing the only food these cats that live inside the gated apartment community have.  I was told I could leave under the tree, past the side walk, on city property, but I believe he is throwing that away, as the past few mornings this week, there was no side of the dishes, even if they were blown away further down the street.  I placed a plate inside the gate yesterday morning, only to find he had come out after I left and threw it away.  I know, I went back and checked.  So I slid another plate of food in, and dumped it there.  It was still there this morning, covered in snow.  Those animals must have been so confused about their food.  This morning, I went there first thing, 4:10 am. and did the same thing.  Food was still there when I went to check on it 45 minutes later.  Again, this is legal animal cruelty, to withhold food for these cats that live there, that don't know enough to go somewhere else, for the ones that cannot climb that fence to get the food under the tree.  Its disgusting and I don't know what to do about it.

And I don't know what to do about Mr. Whiskers #2 either.  I don't know how to get an injured cat.  I don't think he will fall for a regular trap.

Tomorrow begins TNR clinic each Tuesday, where I have two spots available to me each week, at $50 per cat.  With all this snow, I don't know if it will work, and I don't know if I can afford the $100 per week extra.  You really can't place a trap on the snow.  I can't at least.  And I do have to leave for work by 7ish, so I don't have a lot of time here.

I spoke with Eddie on Saturday night, and he confirmed he would take a second cat for company for Parsley.  I was elated.  This would give our Hermie a home. He has been fostered by a wonderful girl who has really gotten him to come out of his shell.  Not a ton, but enough for him to come to her for a pet here or there.  I was elated.  But then I received a call from a dear friend who if you recall, took in at least five-7 cats that I was desperate to get off the streets.  From that moment on, I owed her a lot.  Not that I felt I had to repay her somehow, just that I wanted to, for her goodness.  She called me to say if I hadn't already had a second cat planned for Parsley, would I take one of the kitties she took in, who had been her tenant's cat, who was now moving, and couldn't take the cats.  She actually told me that two needed to be placed.  My heart sank.  I know I owe this woman so much for what she has done, but then the foster for Hermie really needs to move Hermie along too.  He couldn't stay with her forever.  I owe both of these dear women so much.  So since that call, I've been so torn.  I believe I have to go with Hermie, because that was the initial desperate plan.  But now, we have two more cats to find homes for.  I have until June 1st to find them homes.   I will have pics and descriptions of them soon.  I feel sick.  Not just that, but for the mother and six kittens I have to place.

Kittens are a lot of work.  I feel the need to go in and nurture these tiny things every hour.  I wake at night wondering if they are crying.  Its terrible.  I would rather have 100 adult cats than 1 kitten.

Six kittens because Peppercorn came back to me on Saturday morning. If you will recall, my niece's cat had given birth to many stillborns, and one survived.  That was Peppercorn. He was whisked off after a plea for help, to be bottle fed, as momma had no milk.  Momma had an emergency spay.  That cost me $400. Niece has no money.  So I have three kittens in my house, and the mother of these kittens - along with her three other kittens - are being fostered by another friend, who was the one that trapped momma, and saved them all from a basement in the city.  Mother cat is still feral, and after spay, which I will need to take care of, she will go back to the street she was taken from.

If you are still reading this, now for some good news.

I rescued Scooter a/k/a Pixie from Parsells Saturday morning.  I was offered to grab one of the two desperate ones (Marbles on Third and Central being the other one) and a rescue group would take it.  I was thrilled at this. So Scooter (aka Pixie, who was named when I TNR'd her last May) is safe and cared for in a wonderful home right now.  Not so good, I have not seen Marbles now in two mornings.

Sunday morning a couple went to my other fosters to meet Esmeralda, so fingers crossed, thats a match.

Overwhelming weekend, to be sure.

Sorry to be a downer today, but as was mentioned to me, sometimes its one step forward, two steps back.

Have a nice day.