Flashbacks!



I was behind a schoolbus this morning, waiting for it to turn off the expressway exit, and had a minor 'flashback', if you can call it that.  It was a warm cozy feeling, and I felt as if I were very young again.  It lasted about one second, but then I started to think again of something else in my childhood that I've never forgotten.  We used to live in an apartment, my mother, sister and I, and we had a neighbor Sharon, I used to hang out with her daughter.  It was either before my father died, when I was about 11, or after, but Sharon had a boyfriend who lived in the country.  I remember she would take me and her daughter to his house on the weekends to this remote place, with forever fields, and long, winding roads with crickets chirping, and grasshoppers jumping.  Quiet as could be out there.  That was a happy place to revisit in my mind, and for a moment, I felt safe, cozy and secure.  Its hard to explain the feeling that overcame me, feeling like I was maybe 10 years old again, but it was such a great memory, one of the few I have left.

I was also thinking about all the cats I've rescued and adopted out over the years.  I am the type of 'mom' that goes to the person's house, makes sure its not a bad situation for the animal, makes sure the person seems like she loves the cat, and if its a good fit, I reluctantly say my goodbye but 'see you later.'  I always follow-up down the road to make sure things are going well, and the cat is getting along with either another cat or dog, or just the person its been adopted out to.  Most people who have taken a cat from me are in my life, and I see the cat occasionally, or I get updates from time to time.  My family members have adopted many, so I get to see the kitties on a regular basis, as regular as I see my family.  But there have been people that would rather I don't follow up, and thats been hard.  These type of people obviously are not the kind of people I would have normally adopted out to, because its important for me to follow up, make sure that cat is OK.  But in the rescue business, and for me being a one-person business, you have to trust because these cats need to find a home, I can't keep them all.  So you do what you have to do, reluctantly.  As I drove and fed at the first 5 spots, I counted that I had just fed 21 cats.  And that was only less than half my spots.  Think about it.  21 cats alone.  They all need homes.  Thats just half of what sidles up to me each morning hungrily waiting for the food to be placed before them.  And they all need homes.  So sad.

On a brighter note, yesterday, at close to my last spot, I was petting the new mama cat, that looks like a Van Gogh painting, and finally went round the corner to 2nd where there are young teenage kittens, kindhearted Laura surprised me.  She was there with her box trap set up for TNR'g because she had problems with her own area and needed to get some kitties.  Such a kindhearted good woman to help me out with my own clan.  Really.  I do need the help.  Its all me, all by my lonesome out there.  And its a struggle.  Every bit of help I can get is so appreciated.  Have a great day!

"Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw

all the paint on it you can."